subconscious

I really regretted yesterday?s behavior seriously. I took a whole bunch of medicine, and gradually lost my conscious. Once I lost my conscious, I cannot think logically, frequently, I do not remember what did I do while I lost my conscious.
There days, my anxiety level is increasing. I cannot stand without any medicine. Always I feel loneliness. I?m isolated. Nobody cares whether I am alive or not.
Because of listening trouble (the office tool wrong CD), I have to take TOEIC once again in Canada. Therefore, this Saturday?s TOEIC will be my final. (hopefully)
On Sunday, my host mom will take place my farewell. Besides, next Monday, my friend will have a small party as well. Then, I will say good bye to Canada.
That is, I still have 3days left that I can conduct to eating disorder.
I have to find some more souvenirs.
Too tired.
Too frustrated.
Even I cannot contact to some company in Japan as recruit because I cannot read and write in Japanese.
Byebye